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The Economist's Joke Memo: A Company Tries to Fix Its Staff's Sleep, and Everything Goes Wrong — episode cover art
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《经济学人》的玩笑邮件:一家公司想让员工睡好觉,结果全乱套了

The Economist's Joke Memo: A Company Tries to Fix Its Staff's Sleep, and Everything Goes Wrong

About this story

The Economist's Bartleby column wrote a satirical company memo about a sleep program gone wrong: staff woken at 2 a.m. for "pre-industrial" segmented sleep, bosses' 3 a.m. messages that got everyone up earlier, sleep trackers that made people anxious, and a weighted blanket that needed the fire brigade. The episode says plainly that the memo is a joke — then shows the two real things behind it: historian Roger Ekirch's evidence for "first sleep" and "second sleep", and the 2017 finding that tracker scores can make sleep worse. Chinese listening practice at four levels. HSK 3 Chinese listening practice.

This is an HSK 3-4 Chinese listening episode that runs about 4 minutes. The full Mandarin script is shown with tap-for-pinyin and a line-by-line English translation, so you can listen and read at once — comprehensible input in the sense of Stephen Krashen's i+1 theory. It teaches 12 key vocabulary words such as 适应、压力、相信 and walks through 3 grammar patterns, each explained in English with examples. The same news story is retold at 4 difficulty levels — use the level selector above to find the version that is challenging but still understandable for you.

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原文

Read the complete story in Chinese. Reveal pinyin and English only when you need them.

今天这个故事,是一个笑话,但里面有两件真事。
英国杂志《经济学人》有一个专门写职场的专栏。
这个星期,专栏作者写了一封假的公司内部邮件。
公司是编的,邮件也是编的,可是很多上班族读完都会觉得眼熟。
邮件一开头就说,公司的一位高层特别重视睡眠。
公司相信,员工睡得好,工作状态才会好。
于是,公司在加拿大的团队和全球的法务部门,做了一些睡眠试验。
第一个试验,是让志愿者按照工业时代以前的方式睡觉。
他们要在半夜两点起床,工作两个小时,再回去睡第二觉。
这听起来很奇怪,可它背后的历史是真的。
美国一位历史学家研究发现,过去很多人一晚上分两次睡。
第一觉睡到半夜,醒来一个小时左右,做点事,然后睡第二觉。
他在以前的日记和书里,找到了五百多处这样的记载。
后来,家里和街上的灯越来越亮,大家晚上睡得越来越晚。
到了一百年前,一晚上睡两次的说法,差不多消失了。
回到假公司。
有些人适应了这种节奏,有些人却再也睡不着,累得说不出话。
一位销售在和客户开会时进入了第二觉,一笔大生意就这样没了。
更麻烦的是连锁反应。
领导们半夜三点开始发邮件、发消息,没参加试验的年轻员工,也只好早早起床回复。
他们一早起,又带动了更多同事提前上班。
算下来,整个公司的睡眠质量反而下降了。
第二个试验,是给员工发各种睡眠追踪设备,比如戒指、手环和手表。
五分之一的同事,根本没办法让设备正常工作。
能用的人,压力也不小。
很多人本来觉得休息得很好,直到设备告诉他们,昨晚睡得很糟糕。
这一点也有真实的研究。
二零一七年,美国的睡眠医生发表文章,说有的病人就是这样。
他们给这种问题起了个名字,叫“完美睡眠焦虑”。
意思是,有人太在意设备上的数字,结果越想睡好,越睡不好。
在假公司里,设备数据还显示,整个领导层在一次会议上都睡着了。
公司的说法是:这当然不可能是真的。
其他的小办法,效果也不一样。
有人戴着眼罩半夜醒来,以为自己被绑架了。
一位个子小的同事,被很重的被子压住,出不来,最后是消防队把她救了出来。
法务部一位同事不小心把喷雾喷到了自己脸上,去了医院,现在这件事还在打官司。
所以邮件说:以后不要再找律师做试验了。
最后,邮件给出了几条建议。
不过在建议之前,我们先回头看看。
这封邮件是笑话,可是里面有两件事是真的。
一件是,以前的人一晚上睡两次。
另一件是,太在意睡眠数字,会让人更睡不好。
好,现在看邮件的建议。
不要强迫员工参加这类活动,谁需要睡眠用品,就提供给谁。
半夜追踪员工,太侵犯隐私。
让所有人用同一种方法,也没有效果。
至于要不要在全公司推广,邮件的最后一句是:我们还是睡一觉再说吧。
你觉得,公司应该管员工的睡眠吗?
English transcript reference

Today's story is a joke, but there are two true things inside it.

Britain's Economist magazine has a column that writes specifically about the workplace.

This week, the columnist wrote a fake internal company email.

The company is made up and so is the email, yet many office workers will find it strangely familiar.

The email opens by saying that a senior executive at the company takes sleep very seriously.

The company believes that when employees sleep well, they perform well.

So the company ran some sleep trials with its team in Canada and its legal department worldwide.

The first trial had volunteers sleep the way people did before the industrial age.

They had to get up at two in the morning, work for two hours, then go back for a second sleep.

It sounds strange, but the history behind it is real.

An American historian found through his research that many people used to sleep in two parts each night.

They'd sleep the first sleep until the middle of the night, wake for about an hour, do a few things, then have a second sleep.

In old diaries and books, he found more than five hundred such records.

Later, as lights in homes and on streets grew brighter, people went to bed later and later.

By about a hundred years ago, the idea of sleeping twice a night had all but disappeared.

Back to the fake company.

Some people adapted to this rhythm; others could never get back to sleep and were too exhausted to speak.

One salesperson slipped into his second sleep during a client meeting, and a big deal was lost just like that.

Even more troublesome was the chain reaction.

Senior managers began sending emails and messages at three a.m., so younger employees who weren't even in the trial had to get up early to reply.

Their early starts then pushed even more colleagues to start work early.

Once you add it all up, sleep quality across the whole company actually went down.

The second trial gave employees all kinds of sleep-tracking devices — rings, wristbands and watches.

One in five colleagues simply couldn't get the devices to work.

Those who could use them were under plenty of stress too.

Many people felt well rested — until the device told them they'd slept terribly the night before.

There's real research on this as well.

In 2017, American sleep doctors published a paper saying some of their patients were exactly like this.

They gave the problem a name, which translates roughly as "perfect-sleep anxiety".

It means that some people care so much about the numbers on their devices that the harder they try to sleep well, the worse they sleep.

In the fake company, the device data also showed the entire leadership team asleep in one meeting.

The company's position: of course that can't possibly be true.

The other small measures had mixed results.

Some people woke up in the night wearing eye masks and thought they'd been kidnapped.

One petite colleague was pinned under a heavy blanket and couldn't get out; in the end the fire brigade rescued her.

A colleague in legal accidentally sprayed himself in the face, went to hospital, and the matter is still in litigation.

So the email said: in future, don't use lawyers in trials.

At the end, the email made a few recommendations.

But before the recommendations, let's look back for a moment.

This email is a joke, but two things in it are true.

One is that people used to sleep twice a night.

The other is that caring too much about sleep numbers can make people sleep worse.

Right, now for the email's recommendations.

Don't force employees to take part in this kind of thing; whoever needs sleep aids can have them.

Tracking employees in the middle of the night is too much of an invasion of privacy.

Making everyone use the same method doesn't work either.

As for whether to roll it out across the whole company, the email's last line was: let's sleep on it.

Do you think a company should have a say in its employees' sleep?

Listen again

Try it without the transcript and notice what sounds clearer.

What vocabulary does this episode teach?

词汇
shìyìngto adapt

HSK 3. 有些人适应了这种节奏,有些人却再也睡不着。

yālìpressure, stress

HSK 3. 能用的人,压力也不小 — the tracker creates new stress.

xiāngxìnto believe

HSK 2. 公司相信,员工睡得好,工作状态才会好。

jiéguǒas a result; result

HSK 3. 越想睡好,结果越睡不好 — the irony in one line.

xiāoximessage

HSK 3. 领导们半夜三点开始发邮件、发消息.

lìshǐhistory

HSK 2. 它背后的历史是真的 — the first real fact.

shuìmiánsleep (noun)

The formal noun: 睡眠质量, 睡眠试验. The everyday verb is 睡觉.

shìyàntrial, experiment

做了一些睡眠试验 — every one of them goes wrong.

shèbèidevice

HSK 4. 睡眠追踪设备,比如戒指、手环和手表.

liánsuǒ fǎnyìngchain reaction

Bosses' 3 a.m. messages → juniors up early → everyone up early.

jiāolǜanxiety, anxious

“完美睡眠焦虑” — the 2017 doctors' name for tracker-driven sleep worry.

yǐnsīprivacy

半夜追踪员工,太侵犯隐私 — the memo's serious point.

* beyond level超纲词

What grammar patterns appear in this episode?

语法

越……,越……

The more X, the more Y — perfect for the tracker irony.

意思是,有人太在意设备上的数字,结果越想睡好,越睡不好。

……反而……

On the contrary; the opposite of what was expected happened.

算下来,整个公司的睡眠质量反而下降了。

至于……

As for… — turns to a final, separate question.

至于要不要在全公司推广,邮件的最后一句是:我们还是睡一觉再说吧。

Proper nouns

专有名词
《经济学人》JīngjìxuérénThe Economist英国YīngguóBritain美国Měiguóthe United States加拿大JiānádàCanada

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