"佛罗里达男子"又来了：车顶绑鳄鱼穿越三个县

Because these three words represent an entire news category.

The kind of absurd incidents that only happen in Florida.

Like "Florida man chases store employee on electric wheelchair in Walmart."

Like "Florida man tries to buy beer with a live alligator."

That kind of news.

A new entry joined this hall of fame this week.

Two tourists strapped a dead alligator to their car roof.

Drove through three Florida counties.

Then got arrested.

The story goes like this.

Two people.

Anthony Buhl, fifty-six, from New York.

March Chadwick, fifty-seven, from Tennessee.

They were touring central Florida.

One day they saw a dead alligator on the road.

Very likely hit by a car.

Seeing a dead alligator on the roadside in Florida isn't unusual.

Florida has about 1.3 million wild alligators.

They appear in all kinds of unbelievable places.

Swimming pools, golf courses, supermarket entrances.

So one dead on the road.

Florida locals wouldn't even blink.

But these two men are not from Florida.

After seeing this alligator.

They had an idea.

"Let's take it home and have it taxidermied."

Taxidermy is when you specially preserve a dead animal.

Making it look like it's alive.

For display at home.

This isn't uncommon in America.

Especially in the South.

Many hunters mount deer heads or fish as specimens on their walls.

But alligators are different.

In Florida, alligators are protected by state law.

Whether alive or dead.

You can't hunt them.

Can't capture them.

Can't possess them.

Not even dead ones on the roadside.

These two men either didn't know this law.

Or knew but chose to ignore it.

They loaded the alligator onto their car roof.

Secured it with rope.

Then hit the road.

Someone first spotted them near Disney World Resort.

Just outside Orlando.

Imagine that scene.

Under Florida's sunshine.

An ordinary sedan.

With a big alligator strapped to the roof.

Passing Disney road signs.

Passing families headed to see Mickey Mouse.

Someone took photos.

Someone called the police.

Police began tracking the vehicle.

Florida's highways have automatic license plate recognition.

So tracking wasn't hard.

The car drove from Orlando all the way to Melbourne.

Melbourne is about an hour southeast of Orlando.

Crossing at least three counties in between.

But something even funnier happened in between.

Someone on the road told them.

"What you're doing is illegal."

"You can't take an alligator."

After hearing this, what did they do?

They didn't put the alligator back.

No.

They took out a white sheet.

And covered the alligator.

Like putting a blanket on it.

As if it doesn't exist if you can't see it.

But the problem is.

The outline of an alligator.

Even covered with a sheet, it still looks like an alligator.

Nobody would think it's a surfboard or a suitcase.

Way too obvious.

The court document states.

"The defendants, after being warned by multiple parties that possession of an alligator is illegal,

covered the alligator with a white sheet."

This sentence is in an official legal document.

I couldn't help laughing when I read it.

Finally police stopped them in Melbourne.

Both admitted they knew it was illegal.

They said they just wanted to take it home for taxidermy.

Both were charged with illegal killing, possession, or capture of alligators.

This is a felony in Florida.

Each posted five thousand dollars bail.

Court appearance on April 28th.

Why is this story so funny?

First, the visual.

A car with an alligator strapped to its roof driving on the highway.

Passing Disney.

That image alone is a painting.

Second, the covering-with-a-white-sheet operation.

This "if I can't see the problem it doesn't exist" logic.

Is a very human response.

Absurd but real.

Third, the "Florida Man" cultural symbol.

Americans have a special view of Florida.

They think anything strange can happen there.

Actually the reason is simple.

Florida has very transparent public records laws.

Called the "Sunshine Law."

Police arrest records are completely public.

So reporters can easily find these strange stories.

Other states have strange things too.

You just can't see them.

Florida just makes them all public.

So every week there's "Florida Man" news.

But regardless of the reason.

This story is one of the funniest news stories of the year so far.

Two non-Florida men.

Went to Florida.

Did the most "Florida" thing possible.

Strapped an alligator to their car roof.

Covered it with a white sheet.

Then got caught.

If this isn't Florida.

I don't know what Florida is.

Actually thinking about it more, this story has another interesting angle.

These two men were clearly told it was illegal.

Their response wasn't to stop.

But to cover it with a sheet.

This mentality is actually very common.

Not just with alligators.

In life, when many people face a problem.

Their first reaction isn't to solve the problem.

But to pretend the problem doesn't exist.

Put a "white sheet" over the problem.

Then keep driving forward.

Until they get caught.

You could say this story is silly.

But you could also say.

It's actually a story about human nature.

When facing rules and consequences.

Some people choose to comply.

Some people choose to ignore.

Some people choose to cover it with a sheet.

Then pray nobody notices.

This is probably why "Florida Man" news makes you laugh but also makes you think.

Because you recognize that logic.

You've seen it in yourself too.

You just haven't strapped an alligator to your car roof.